Gilbey's

So I gave a small, approving grunt upon noticing a bottle of gin for $8.99 on the top shelf at the liquor store. (Yes, I've been relegated to the liquore store like every other schmoe, since Ft. Benning saw the need to take my military ID away and deny me my Class 6 entry.) Something didn't add up, though, because even the smaller bottles on the lower shelves cost more.

Now, admittedly, I had a bottle of Old Crow in my other hand, but when it comes to gin, I usually don't like to skimp. Bombay Sapphire is usually what I get; gin is kind of a treat. But I've got a few ounces of Vermouth in the liquor cabinet and nothing much to do with it (and olives and toothpicks, too.) So I ended up tentatively taking the bottle of Gilbey's.

Apparently the liquor store clerk saw me musing for a while and asked if I needed help.

I said, "Is this good gin?"

"Well, it's not terrible gin," she said.

"Why is it on the top shelf?" I asked.

She looked at it, then looked at the Old Crow in my other hand. Then she got that look in her face. Okay, shut up, I love my blue collar bourbon, I get it, it's not "cool," whatever.

"Well, it's not top shelf, it's just on the top shelf."

What?