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Friday, April 23, 2010

The Neighbors Are Zombies 11

EXT. PEACEABLE LIVING CEMETERY - BEFORE DAWN
(EDGAR, RED, BO)

GREG FULTON'S RIDING MOWER PUTTERS BY THE CEMETERY. THE NOISE STARTLES EDGAR AWAKE. HE IS LYING IN A GRAVE. HE STRETCHES HIS ARMS AND CLIMBS OUT OF THE GRAVE. HE LOOKS AROUND. HE HAS DUG AT LEAST TWENTY GRAVES. HE CHECKS HIS WATCH.

EDGAR

Woo, almost dawn.

AS EDGAR CLIMBS INTO HIS CAR, THE CAMERA ZOOMS IN ON RED AND BO, WHO ARE HIDING BEHIND A BUSH. RED IS SMOKING A CIGARETTE AND OBSERVING EDGAR THROUGH BINOCULARS.

RED

Time to cut the Captain Crunch, Count Chocula. You've been feeding me a line all night about this Joe being dead. Well, the telegraph station is closed and I've got indigestion. He's walking, he's talking, he's as alive as my considerable love life.

BO

He is the walking dead. He is one of my creations. A zombie.

RED

Zombie, yeah, that's the guy's name, Edgar Zombie. That doesn't mean he's a...

RED MAKES A RIDICULOUS IMPERSONATION OF A ZOMBIE.

BO

Look at how fast he dug those graves. It is because he has dug himself out of his own.

RED

Yeah, that and a cup of coffee will get you fifty cents at a subway bus station. What'd you say your name was again?

BO

I am a Bokor, a master of the arcane arts, summoner of the Loas of a thousand undead ancestors in the ancient medium of Vodun. I am the stealer of souls, the drinker of blood, the raiser of the dead.

RED

I'll just call you Bo, then. There he goes. Let's go.

RED HOPS ONTO A LITTLE GIRL'S BICYCLE, COMPLETE WITH RIBBONS AND A BASKET. BO SITS UP ON THE HANDLEBARS.

BO

Don't you have a car?

RED

I told you, the department doesn't have much of a budget. And I keep hitting suspects so they took away my license.

THEY PEDAL OFF.

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