Manuscripts Burn


MANUSCRIPTS BURN

"Manuscripts don't burn"
- Mikhail Bulgakov

Hi, I'm Splatterpunk Award-winning horror and science fiction author Steve Kozeniewski (pronounced: "causin' ooze key.") Welcome to my blog! You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, and Amazon. You can e-mail me here, join my mailing list here, or request an e-autograph here. Free on this site you can listen to me recite one of my own short works, "The Thing Under the Bed."

Wednesday, October 9, 2019

Introducing Stephen’s Virtual Gopher




You may have noticed by now, that a few of Stephen’s posts have been taken over by a secondary mind. I assure you, this isn’t the result of a symbiote merging with him and feeding on his essence. That would be cruel to the symbiote.

No, I’m his new assistant, Jessica Eppley, and I am now at one with Stephen’s virtual presence. I answer his e-mails, send out his review requests, and manage his Facebook page. I’ve recently begun tinkering with the blog too. I’ve never really managed a blog before, so it’s a learning process. I am basically a cavewoman still stuck in the early 2000’s virtually (I still use Word 2010 and my laptop is 10 years old), so forgive me for any mistakes there.

I am also a writer…or I should say I attempt to be a writer now and then. I’ve dabbled in multiple genres, but I am mostly known for my fantasy series, ‘The Book of Siavon’, which you can check out on my website. I’m always working on multiple stories as the same time, like a squirrel burying nuts all over the yard. And, just like a squirrel, I tend to get distracted and forget all about one story to work on another. When I do finally publish something, you can rest assured it took a painstaking amount of time to perfect.

If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m a huge dork. I speak in movie quotes and am fluent in snark. I’m an amateur cosplayer and love vending at cons. I actually met Stephen at Harrisburg Comic Con, and forgot him almost immediately because I was too distracted by all the bright colors. 

I’m a bit surprised that he considered me for the position, since I spent all weekend screaming at people that I liked their T-shirts and running around covered in fake blood. He must be desperate. Or he has no friends. I’m not sure.

Well, I guess I’m not the worst choice, since I love working on menial shit. It mellows me out and silences the internal screaming for a few precious hours a day.
Anyway, that’s why you’re seeing random posts by a chick on Stephen’s page. He wasn’t hacked. He’s just too busy to bother engaging with any of you now that he’s a big shot.

Thanks for having me. I’ll try to keep this entertaining.

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