The Neighbors Are Zombies 2

ACT ONE

SCENE A

EXT. THE FULTON LAWN - DUSK
(JESSE FULTON, GREG FULTON, LOUISE FULTON, A MOVER, MARY ZOMBIE)

JESSE IS MOWING THE FRONT LAWN ON A RIDING MOWER. HIS FATHER, GREG, IS PRUNING SOME TREES. SUDDENLY A HUGE YELLOW MOVING TRUCK PULLS INTO THE DRIVEWAY NEXT DOOR. JESSE TURNS AND LOOKS. HE IS SO EXCITED HE JUMPS OFF THE MOWER AND RUNS UP TO HIS FATHER. OF COURSE, THE MOWER IS STILL PUTTERING ALONG.

JESSE
(pointing at the moving truck)

Dad! Look at that.

GREG STOPS HIS PRUNING AND LOOKS

GREG

Well, I'll be. Someone bought the Joneses' house.

JESSE

So we have someone new to keep up with?

GREG

Quiet, boy. Well, if they're new to the neighborhood maybe we should invite them to the barbecue.

JESSE

And by "we" you mean me.

GREG

Smart as a whip, that's my boy. Now get your ass over there.

JESSE

What about the mower?

GREG

What about...my mower!

THE MOWER IS PUTTERING DOWN THE STREET. GREG THROWS HIS PRUNING SHEARS AND TAKES OFF WILDLY AFTER THE MOWER. THE SHEARS, OF COURSE, SHATTER A WINDOW.

LOUISE'S VOICE (O.S.)
(shrilly shrieking)

Gregory!

JESSE FOLDS HIS HANDS BEHIND HIS BACK AND WHISTLES AS HE WALKS OVER INTO HIS NEIGHBOR'S YARD. HE LOOKS IN THE BACK OF THE TRUCK, WHICH IS ALMOST EMPTY. THERE IS ONE OBJECT LEFT, WHICH COULD BE A HUMAN HEAD WRAPPED IN BROWN PAPER AND TWINE. JESSE EVER-SO-SLOWLY REACHES INTO THE TUCK TO PICK UP THE HEAD SHAPED OBJECT. SUDDENLY, THE MOVING TRUCK ROARS INTO LIFE AND JESSE JUMPS BACK. HE LOOKS AT THE MOVER DRIVING, WHO IS PALE WHITE AND OBVIOUSLY FRIGHTENED TO DEATH. THE DRIVER BACKS THE TRUCK OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY SO FAST THAT HIS TIRES SHRIEK.

JESSE

Hey, wait! There's still stuff in the back!

THE TRUCK FLIES DOWN THE SUBURBAN STREET AT 60 MILES PER HOUR OR MORE. THE HEAD-SHAPED OBJECT FLIES OUT OF THE BACK. JESSE WALKS UP TO THE OBJECT AND PICKS IT UP. SLOWLY HE TAKES THE TWINE IN HIS FINGERS AND STARTS TO PULL, WHEN MARY'S HANDS TAKE THE OBJECT FROM HIM. JESSE JUMPS, BUT WHEN HE SEES MARY HE IS STARTLED BY HOW PRETTY SHE IS.

MARY

Oh, thank you. I was afraid they had forgotten to bring this in.

JESSE
(in the throes of puppy love)

Yeah...hey, you know, that guy looked terrified when he drove off.

MARY
(rolling her eyes)

Oh, yeah. My dad has that effect on people. I'm Mary. Mary Zombie. We're new here.

JESSE

Jesse Fulton. I've lived in Willberry all my life...unfortunately.

THEY SHAKE HANDS. JESSE'S HEART IS THUMPING.

MARY

Oh, it doesn't seem that bad here. Nice lawns, big houses, everybody has a car. It's a lot better than Haiti was.

JESSE

You're from Haiti? You're lucky. I've never even been out of Willberry.

MARY

I'll tell you about it sometime. I need to go inside though, it's time for breakfast.

JESSE

Breakfast? It's almost seven. You mean dinner.

MARY

Oh, yeah, that's what I meant. Sorry about my English.

BEHIND THEM, THE LAWNMOWER PUTTERS SLOWLY BY ON THE STREET. JESSE'S DAD IS SWEATING AND HUFFING AND PUFFING AS HE RUNS AFTER IT.

GREG

Damn you, John Deere!

THE TWO KIDS STOP FOR A MINUTE TO WATCH THE MAN CHASE HIS PRIZED MOWER OFFSCREEN. THEN THEY TURN BACK TO EACH OTHER.

JESSE

Oh, that reminds me, my dad's having a big block party tomorrow. There'll be burgers and ponies and crap like that. He wanted me to invite you and your family. I'd...really like it if you'd come.

MARY

Well, I'll tell my parents, but they don't like to come out much. Bye, Jesse.

JESSE

Bye, Mary.


MARY STARTS UP THE LAWN TOWARDS HER DOOR.

JESSE
(calling after her)

Hey, wait! What's in that package?

MARY
(over her shoulder)

Just a vase!

MARY DISAPPEARS INSIDE HER HOUSE. ALL OF THE WINDOWSHADES ARE CLOSED AND THE HOUSE IS UTTERLY INSCRUTABLE FROM THE OUTSIDE. WHEN HE'S SURE SHE CAN'T SEE HIM, HE STAGGERS BACKWARDS, CLUTCHING HIS HEART.

JESSE

She touched me...I'll never wash this hand again.

HE HOLDS UP THE HAND HE SHOOK MARY'S HAND WITH AND LOOKS AT IT. IT IS COVERED WITH A GROSS PUS AND THERE ARE A FEW MAGGOTS ON IT.

JESSE

Eww!

JESSE WIPES HIS HAND ON HIS SHIRT IN DISGUST.