***Sorry for the day late business. Somehow Friday just slipped my mind. Anyhows, enjoy the triumphant final entry in The Neighbors Are Zombies saga.***
EXT. THE FULTON LAWN - DAY
(JESSE, GREG, LOUISE, EDGAR, ANNE, MARY, H.P., BABY, BO, BULLET)
THE ZOMBIE FAMILY IS ON THE FRONT LAWN, WEARING SUNGLASSES AND FAR TOO MANY LAYERS FOR A NICE SUMMER DAY. ANNE IS TRYING TO SQUIRT SPF 75 SUNBLOCK ON H.P. WHO IS NATURALLY STRUGGLING.
Stop squirming or your skin is going to come off.
JESSE COMES RUNNING TOWARDS THEM. HE LOOKS EXCITED.
Come on, Zombies! The party's out back.
THE ZOMBIES BEGIN TO LUMBER BACK TOWARDS THE BARBECUE. BO AND BULLET ARE HIDING IN THE BUSHES IN THE ZOMBIE LAWN AND THEY STICK THEIR HEADS UP TO LOOK OVER THE FENCE AT THE FULTON BARBECUE.
A barbecue and I wasn't even invited. I ought to arrest the whole lot of them.
Look. There are my creations.
THE ZOMBIES WALK BY.
Time to take them down.
RED PULLS OUT A PISTOL AND COCKS IT. SUDDENLY THE LAWNMOWER COMES PUTTERING UP THE LAWN TOWARDS RED AND BO. RED TURNS AND, STARTLED, EMPTIES HIS WHOLE CLIP INTO THE LAWNMOWER, BUT IT DOESN'T STOP.
It won't stop!
RED AND BO DIVE OUT OF THE WAY. THE LAWNMOWER PUTTERS FORWARD A FEW MORE FEET AND COMES TO A STOP, OUT OF GAS AT LAST. RED STANDS UP. ALL THE BARBECUE GUESTS ARE HANGING OVER THE FENCE, LOOKING AT HIM. LOOKING AROUND, HE SEES THAT BO HAS RUN OFF. HE PUTS HIS PISTOL BACK IN HIS HOLSTER.
Well, Fulton, I found your lawnmower.
Wow, detective, and here all these years I've been calling you an incompetent blowhard who never solved a case. But here you solved one.
Yeah, well, just doing my job.
Why don't you come over and join the barbecue.
Yeah, I think I will.
THE BARBECUE IS A HUGE SUCCESS. H.P. IS PLAYING WITH SOME OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS, AMUSING THEM WITH HIS ANTICS AND TRICKS THAT ONLY A ZOMBIE COULD DO. LOUISE FULTON AND ANNE ZOMBIE SIT FOR A LONG TIME DRINKING MARGARITAS AND DISCUSSING THEIR FAMILIES. THE BABY IS A HIT WITH EVERYONE. EDGAR SHOWS GREG A MUCH FASTER WAY TO DIG HIS GARDEN. RED TURNS OUT TO BE THE BEST LIMBO CONTESTANT IN TOWN. HE TAKES HIS LIMBO TROPHY AND POINTS AT ED.
I've got my eye on you.
I've got my eye on you, too.
RED LOOKS DOWN. OF COURSE, EDGAR'S EYE IS IN RED'S POCKET. HE PULLS IT OUT AND TOSSES IT AWAY. FINALLY THE CAMERA SETTLES ON MARY AND JESSE WHO ARE SITTING UNDER A TREE TOGETHER.
Well, I've got to admit, Jesse, you were right about helping us to fit in.
Oh, this is just the beginning. Wait until you get to school!
I'm looking forward to it.
MARY LEANS OVER AND KISSES JESSE ON THE CHEEK. THEN SHE JUMPS UP AND RUNS OFF. JESSE REACHES UP AND TOUCHES HIS CHEEK.
I'll never wash...ewww.
HE PULLS HIS HAND AWAY AND IT IS COVERED WITH GOO. BO, MEANWHILE IS SKULKING OUT OF SIGHT. HE WATCHES THE ZOMBIES AS THEY MINGLE.
Enjoy yourselves for now. You will be mine again soon.
BO TURNS AND WALKS AWAY, BUT HE TUMBLES INTO A DITCH.
"Manuscripts don't burn"
- Mikhail Bulgakov
Hi, I'm horror and science fiction author Steve Kozeniewski (pronounced: "causin' ooze key.") Welcome to my blog! You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, and Amazon. You can e-mail me here, join my mailing list here, or request an e-autograph here. Free on this site you can listen to me recite one of my own short works, "The Thing Under the Bed."
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