And now for the long-awaited results of the Upset on the Internet:
THE GOOD NEWS: We both passed the magical double-digit mark in Amazon reviews over the course of this competition, meaning that whole new vistas of advertising are open to us!
THE BAD NEWS: In every wager, even a friendly one, someone must lose. And I am in no sense sorry to report:
MELISSA LOST!!!
And as per our agreement, I will now turn the blog over to Melissa to tell you:
Why Zombies are Amazing! (also known as what you have to write when you lose a bet)
1. Zombies are brainless…and they aren’t sorry about it!
Some people who are in fact brainless think they have a
brain. They think they are smart and funny and cool, (think Kayne West and
Honey Boo Boo’s mom ) when really they are just stupid as heck! But zombies
savor their brainlessness. They are stupid and damn proud of it. How many humans
do you know who can say that?
2. Zombies aren’t hung up on looks.
Unlike everyone else in the world, zombies don’t care about
appearances. You won’t find a "Sexiest Zombie Alive" issue from People magazine
(despite the fact they are in fact sexy as heck.) Instead, zombies are
satisfied with their flaky skin, horrid teeth, and blacked-out eyes. Zombies are
the kings and queens of self-acceptance from whom we may all learn a bit about
our own personal issues with self-love.
3. Zombies know what they want.
Unlike many of us, zombies have a singular purpose. They
don’t have to worry about multi-tasking, juggling family and work time, or
fitting in some cardio. No no no. Zombies just want to find human prey. They
just need to hone in on the right, unsuspecting human on which to feed. Day
after day after day. Their one-track minds are enviable. I’m sure you would
agree.
So that, my friends, is why zombie literature (yes, I said "literature") is more amazing than any other genre known to man (or zombie). Better than any obscure Irish lyricist. Better
than hermit-like female poets from Massachusetts. And even better than BDSM
writers from London who make millions off Twilight Fan Fiction. Yes, folks, you
heard it here first. Zombies are indeed the best.
About the Author:
When she turned forty, Melissa decided to renew her adolescent passion for fiction writing. Having once thought publishing a novel to be an impossible dream, she’s proud to be achieving her lifelong goal. In addition to writing, she’s a full-time teacher, an avid runner, and a somewhat reluctant tri-athlete.
Summary of EVER NEAR:
Nantucket Island is haunted, but only sixteen-year-old Jade Irving knows it. Ignoring the disturbing spirits isn’t an option, because one dwells in the enormous historic home she shares with her newly blended family. Jade is finding it more and more difficult to explain away Lacey’s ghostly, anguished tantrums, especially with Charlie, her gorgeous, almost step-brother, living right across the hall.
When a power-hungry ghost hunter tracks down Jade and blackmails her, Jade’s secret teeters on the edge of exposure, and her entire future hangs in the balance. If anyone finds out Jade can talk to ghosts, her life will be forever changed.
Can she save herself, free Lacey, and hang on to her tenuous connection with Charlie? Or will everything she ever wanted slip through her fingers?
***
Be sure to purchase EVER NEAR at:Amazon
Barnes & Noble
Kobo
iBookstore
And don't forget to review it and tell your friends about it on:
Lol! Totally made me smile, Melissa. You 'lost' w/grace & style, girl. =)
ReplyDeleteWhen you get a guest post like this out of it, everybody's a winner!
DeleteThanks Leandra and Stephen!
ReplyDeleteThanks for doing it! It's really good!
Delete